Conflict Resolution

Conflict resolution. Reconciliation. It is a very biblical issue. Matthew 18:15-18 gives us direction as far as how to address these types of problems.

First, go the the person who has offended or sinned against you. If you have no basis or proof of this issue, it may not be a conflict at all. Go get the scripture that proves your point or have evidence of the sin. Think about if this is truly worth your time. Sometimes when emotions surrounding an issue are de-esculated, you find out that it was not a big deal at all. If that is NOT the case, proceed to the next biblical step.

Second, tell someone in authority at church if the person does not hear you. You need to widen the circle and have reasons for your accusation against someone. Obviously, this is an important move. Do not ignore the situation or look to this world for justice. If you do not trust your Pastor or Minister at church, there is even a bigger issue. The Church is a hospital, but it is also a courtroom. Let's resolve our issues in the Body of Christ. Prayer and surrounding yourself with good counsel works. Be ready to accept that you just MIGHT be wrong. Be ready to forgive!

Thirdly, make a separation between the two of you. If this person cannot receive that they committed error and ask for forgiveness, they should be treated as a "tax collector"...lol! In bible days, those who collected tax were not honorable, honest and respectable. It may be hard, but pray for wisdom to guide your affairs with discretion if you have to deal with them. The Bible never instructs us to put our trust in people. It is wisdom to put a difference there.

Prayer: Lord, teach me to be a peacemaker and one who reconciles relationships. Show me how to forgive and to receive forgiveness in Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Action: Ask the Lord to reveal to you any relationships in need of conflict resolution then take the steps needed to put things in order biblically!

Watch the Scope: https://www.periscope.tv/anitamckaney/1yNGaeybBAdGj

Roadtrip conflicts happen...too often!!

When Marriage Hurts

"Why can't you understand the words coming out of my mouth?!

You did not hear one word that I just said! I'm tired of repeating myself.

Stop interrupting me and maybe we can come to an agreement!

You don't care. You are not even trying to meet me halfway! You don't even love me."

Have you ever said those things to your husband? I have. I was hurting. When what we feel is not communicated to our husbands, we can get very angry, sad, resentful and bitter. No one likes that feeling,  but what should we do? Have you ever felt that you are trying your best and are still under-appreciated? Yeah, Jesus has definitely been there too!

Here are some biblical tips for Communication in marriage:

1. Offer positive criticisms. Accusations sound like what the devil does.

2. Agree on a set time to talk about conflicts.

3. Actually listen, not prepare a rebuttal. This is not a courtroom. The goal is a winning marriage! You don't feel any better if your spouse loses.

4. Use the Word of God in sharing your offense, then stop talking. Check your emotions. Repeating the Word is enough. It works.

5. Don't forget to pray. Seek God before you approach your mate and pray before during & after! Maurice and I have been using these tips for years.

6. Remember to trust God, not your feelings.

We all have expectations in marriage but we need to surrender those to God and love the person we are with. Remember, you both chose each other. Make wise decisions because when you wake up in the morning, they will still be there!