Planning Holiday Giving Together

We decided to do the craziest thing this year. We gave all of our Christmas gifts out already to our family members. They have been bought, paid for and delivered to their recipients. We decided to do it over Thanksgiving to really emphasize the "giving" part of the holiday. People were definitely surprised  and that was the point.  They had another reason to be grateful and our hearts were full from giving. After paying off all of our credit cards not too long ago, we realized that debt had us enslaved. Never again! Yeah we know, it is a little non-traditional and different to spend for Christmas this way, but let us tell you why we did it.

One of us, {Anita}, is the spender of the couple. The other one is the saver. In order to really enjoy the Christmas season (which for a lot of Americans begins the week of Thanksgiving), we decided to do something different in order to focus on each other, the real meaning for the season and less on money.

Many married couples struggle with their finances. We didn't want this to be a burden and so we needed to be proactive. By making a plan to pre-purchase all of our gifts and to give them all out, it curves the tendency to keep buying because we see sale signs everywhere. In most instances, opposites attract in marriage. This goes for most financially as well. Usually one person enjoys the opportunity to save money so that they can purchase later.  The other person enjoys spending and can barely contain  their shopping habits.

We can use our financial habits to refine us or to  divide us.

Managing money is huge in marriage. Some couples have budgets, some don't. Some couples combine all of their finances together and some choose to have separate accounts. The Bible speaks to oneness. No matter how you govern your finances, there should be mutual agreement.

How you plan your money together is similar to how we should be in our spiritual lives. We know that we have an enemy. We know that the enemy comes to steal kill and destroy us. We know that we need to be proactive by making sure we put on the whole armor of God every day. We need to tuck scripture deep in our hearts and save it in advance for the appropriate attacks that we know are coming!  This applies to marriage, to finances and to everyday life.

Financial accountability is a spiritual discipline!

So here are 3 suggestions for any married couple:

1. Make a money plan for now and for the future. It is wise to determine how money should be spent and saved, earned and invested for now and for the future.

2. Bring about what changes need to be made and your family finances. Perhaps you need to reevaluate how money is being spent on a daily basis or start a savings account that will be used later on.

3. Since financial accountability is a spiritual discipline, the Lord must be Ruler over it. Keeping God as first in your finances means that you are somehow helping the kingdom of God to grow whether that is through tithing, offerings at your local Church or Ministry giving.

You may not be radically led to purchase all of your Christmas gifts in advance like we did, but do be willing to make great changes in your finances in order to stay close to the Lord and keep your marriage financially sound.

Staying married over the Holidays

When we first got married the holidays were the best times for us. We look forward to meeting each other's families and growing relationships. Then it was the children! Oh boy, what fun it was to share our newborn bundles with everyone. There was plenty of picture taking and sharing stories.

Then, as our family grew, it was a matter of who was hosting during the holiday season. Who has an apartment large enough? Who has a house? How many people can you accommodate? There was always a question about the food. Who is bringing what? So and so is a vegetarian, pescetarian or they're just a super picky eater. "I don't like the way she/he makes this/that". Then there was the matter of the activities. What are we going to do after we eat? Should we watch a movie? Should we have a singalong? Share testimonies? Maybe we should read a Bible verse or two since we are christians and everything.

After a while, holidays can get to be a hassle because it is more of a chore then enjoyment. Some family members might not get along as well as others. People are now divorced. Somebody is having a baby and it's not a good thing. What happened to our joy? As a couple, we began experiencing more stress and anxiety during the holiday time. The season that was supposed to be happy and joyous suddenly got the better of us. It got the better of our marriage too! We had disagreements about who should come and who should not. There issues about the food, the setting, the music. It was all too very complicated. After all the festivities are over, who wants to cuddle up by a fire and be romantic? We were TIRED! No mistletoe or New Years Eve kiss. And you can forget about sex!

What happened to the simplicity of Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's Day? Aren't these supposed to be the happiest times of the year? For many couples, it is not. Some couples are struggling with losses as well during the seasons. For whatever reason, it's not the way it used to be because so-and-so is gone. We miss grandma, grandpa, the kids before they were teens and had "better things to do". We missed seeing familiar faces that made the holidays so much better. This person is gone and so is their famous pie. Gosh! The holidays will never be the same.

Well let me give you three tips to ensure that you can stay married over the holidays. It IS possible to enjoy the holiday season with your spouse, even if you differ on if you should have a table just for the kids or not.

1. Plan a date. You may be thinking with all that I have to do and all of my appointments and all of the programs who has time for a date? Exactly! Make the time. Every November my husband and I get together to celebrate each other. It is a time to reconnect towards the end of the year and reminisce about our marriage. We talked about where we've been and where we're going. We enjoy each other's company and plan for the future. If your marriage is supposed to be your most important relationship, the others can wait.

2. Make your own traditions. I love our family traditions of how we open gifts and singing songs and many other things. However, when I got married I wanted us to have our very own family traditions. It is important to establish what you do at your house between each other. This will make your marriage stronger and will help you to navigate the holidays knowing that the two of you are working together, not against each other.

3. Remember the Reason for the Season. Among all the things that we have to do and all the to-do lists that we make for the holidays, there is nothing that will bring a couple closer together than keeping Jesus at the center. He is the reason that we made it through the year and the reason that we have a new one to look forward to. He is the reason that we celebrate Christmas and we can thank Him all year long, not just at Thanksgiving. All good marriages are held together by that glue.

So never fear! You can stay married during the holidays. This will be our 15th! Happy Every Day to you and your family from ours :)

Even Me

The Bible says that I am supposed to be an Ambassador for Jesus Christ, a minister of reconciliation. That is the most scariest thing in the world to me. However, I like to be a little bold sometimes and therefore I was up for the challenge. So the best thing to do when you are afraid is to bring a friend or two. I began Wifestyle image Network with the intent of surrounding myself and networking with other women who will take on the bold and daring challenge to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with others using the Titus 2 model. It was a risk as following Jesus Christ is, but I felt an urge in my spirit that I should be doing something more than what I was doing. Working as a nurse and sharing the gospel here and there was students was amazing, but there is always a tug in my spirit that I could be doing more. What about after work? What about before? What was I doing on my off days? Nothing. Nothing eternal anyway. I can no longer go with the thought of doing nothing for Jesus. 

Everyday I want to share the gospel with someone. I figured that the best way to do that was online. I could literally share the Gospel of Jesus Christ every day online for the rest of my life. So with that thought, I was motivated to begin. It didn't have to be much. I could just let people know my story. I could just let people know that Jesus loves them no matter where they are no matter what they were doing. God could change their lives in spite of their sin. Even them.

Ambassadors are foreigners and aliens and not from around here. Since I've been born again I am not from around here. This world is not my home until it makes it easier for me to approach others. I don't live here. I don't know your language. I don't know who you are. But let me tell you about my Jesus and how he has changed my life. Initially I thought I had to have more preparation, more training or even a process, but what I have come to realize is that if I just step out in obedience to God makes a process for me. You can't approach everyone the same way. There is no cookie-cutter way to share the gospel. The way to share the gospel is to be obedient. The way to win souls as to take them to the soul winner who is Christ himself. That means different people come to Jesus in different ways and we have to be willing and open to just be a vessel. I want to be God's vessel. I want to be his Ambassador. Sometimes when I'm sitting in church I feel an urge to pray for someone in particular. That's all I do. They may go to the altar or they may not. Sometimes when I'm at a restaurant I leave a tract for someone. Sometimes they respond and tell me how that blessed them. Other times they look at me so strangely and I'm sure they throw the trash in the trash. But my job is not to give results to God. My job is to give my life to God. Even me.

God so desperately loves so many people in this world and He is desperately looking for more laborers to go out into his field. We don't even know what we're going to be doing out there but He just wants us to go. Go sing. Go preach. Go share. Go be light in the darkness.

I have felt so ill equipped and that no one would want to hear from this church going, Bible carrying, gospel singing, honor roll student who was on fire for Jesus. No one gets excited for Jesus at a young age. No one goes up and down their bus and tells people about Jesus. No one cries in prayer for their friends in the seventh grade. Who does that? Surely only the Jesus Freaks. Freaks Like Me. Even me. Most people thought that I was proud and haughty and better than them. They did not know that I was crying out to God for them and that more than anything I wanted him to know the love of Jesus so that they would not be so depressed and scared and worried about their lives and where they would go when they died. Some people even thought our family was rich because we seem to always have on different clothes. They had no idea that we were very strapped financially and they God supplied our needs by those who gave to our family. We couldn't afford new stuff. But we were happy in Christ. People saw contentment on our faces and that we served Christ in spite of our circumstances. That blew their minds. God had chosen to bless our family in our obedience. Even us.

Your life may be so confusing and chaotic because you have long since neglected God's call to live and work for Him. Everyone has a desire deep down to be loved and cherished just as they are with their gifts, talents and skills. God created you just the way you are just for his purposes. He wants you.

God wants to take your "want to" and plant it in His field. Your life can yield an abundant harvest for His glory. He wants you. Even you.

Prayer: Lord, here I am, just as I am. Take me in my current state and use me for Your glory. I am yours. In Jesus name I pray, amen!

Action: As an Act of Faith and surrender, throw both of your hands in the air and pray this prayer again.

Called or Driven

When we live in doubt, we are driven by emotion. When we act in faith, we are living out our calling. James 1:6 explains about how this affects our prayer lives. He compares it to being tossed like a wave on the sea. Driven people are going along with the flow and are unsure of why they do what they are doing. They only know that they cannot stop.

However, being called is purposeful and has an eternal destination because of the One who is calling you. When God calls you to His agenda, you must go. Look at Jonah. God called him to preach so that the people of Ninevah would repent. He rebelled against his calling....to no avail.

Although these are similar references and they both propel a person, the difference is the person who is providing the force. IF God be for you, who can be against you (Romans 8:31). David was called by God to be more than a shepard. He would be King. Saul tried to stop him, but David declared, "What can man do to me?" (Psalm 118:6).

The force of man is in no way comparable to the power of God. The Lord called Moses to defeat the most powerful man on Earth. He called David to defeat Goliath. He called young Samuel in the night. He called Saul, a murderer of Christ-followers, to do His work. He is calling us as well. No matter your age, race, sex or status, it is time to answer the call!

Prayer: Here am I Lord, send me!

Action: After prayer, spend some time meditating on what God may be calling you to do.

Watch the scope.